In what can only be described as the comedic equivalent of finding deleted scenes on a DVD nobody asked for but everyone immediately watched anyway, Pete Davidson’s longtime writing partner Dave Sirus has unleashed a list of savage roast jokes that allegedly got cut from The Roast of Kevin Hart — and the internet is now treating it like the lost scrolls of chaos comedy.
The discarded punchlines, shared online by Sirus after the Netflix special aired, reportedly targeted everyone from Chelsea Handler and 50 Cent to Draymond Green, Tony Hinchcliffe, and even Kevin Hart himself. Apparently, the roast producers decided there is such a thing as “too spicy,” which is impressive considering roast shows usually operate somewhere between stand-up comedy and a televised HR violation.
Among the jokes left on the cutting-room floor was a jab describing Kevin Hart as “the Michael Jordan of baseball of comedy,” a sentence so confusing it somehow circles back to being genius. Another joke took aim at Hart’s famously short stature, joking he was ready to star in “Wakanda 4’11.” Marvel has not commented, though sources say Ant-Man is interested in a crossover.
Chelsea Handler ended up taking the brunt of the unreleased material. Sirus revealed several eyebrow-raising one-liners involving Handler’s rumored relationship with rapper 50 Cent, including a historical callback comparing “Magic Stick” references to muskets. Historians everywhere reportedly sighed deeply before continuing their work.
Draymond Green also found himself in the comedic crossfire, proving once again that no roast is complete until at least one NBA player catches a stray. Meanwhile, comedian Tony Hinchcliffe was compared to a human amusement park entrance, which may or may not become his new tour poster slogan.
One of the most talked-about cut jokes referenced roast legend Jeff Ross in a line so savage even the backstage catering staff probably winced in unison. According to comedy insiders — and by insiders, we mean people aggressively refreshing Threads — the material may have been removed because producers feared the audience would laugh so hard they’d legally need medical supervision.
Despite the removed jokes, Davidson still stirred controversy during the actual event with remarks referencing late conservative commentator Charlie Kirk. The joke drew criticism from Kirk’s friends and podcast team members, who called the material “distasteful” and “cringe-worthy” during a follow-up discussion on The Charlie Kirk Show podcast.
Still, the internet remains divided on the age-old roast debate: if nobody gasps, was it even a roast?
Netflix has yet to comment on the missing jokes, though viewers are now wondering whether the streaming giant plans to release an “Unrated Davidson Cut” complete with warning labels, therapist recommendations, and possibly a fire extinguisher.
At press time, comedians everywhere were reportedly checking their old notebooks to see which jokes would get them canceled, applauded, or offered a three-special Netflix deal.
